[V.S Series] Joker V.S Bane

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Cumical: Hey guys.

Terdoh: What’s cracking?

Cumical: Good evening and welcome to another episode of our V.S series.

Terdoh: Today, we’ll be facing a debate that has been going on in the Sodas & Popcorn chat room for a really long time.

Cumical: I still believe I’m right sha. There’s nothing you guys want to tell me. He can’t be a better villain.

Terdoh: Won’t you let us at least announce what it is to the people?

Cumical: Do the honours.

Terdoh: Today, on the V.S Series, we’re asking, who’s the better villain? The Joker? Or Bane?

Cumical: Well everyone knows the obvious answer.

Terdoh: Joker right?

Cumical: Nope. The Bane™.

Terdoh: *sigh* Anyway, since this is not your regular Actor vs Actor post, we’re doing things differently today. We’re taking it in terms of;

1 Who had the better plan?

2 Who executed their plan better?

3 Who caused Batman more pain (both physical and emotional)?

4 Who was overall a better villain?

5 Who was a better fit to counter Batman?

6 And finally who was more closely true to their comic book counterparts?

Cumical: *rubs hands together in glee*

***

Who had the better plan?

***

Cumical: How is this even a debate? Did you see what Bane did to the whole of Gotham in a matter of hours?

Terdoh: Yap yap Cumical. What did he do?

Cumical: Shut down the entire Gotham village, made the external military come to Gotham’s borders and literally protect the city from invasion, destroyed an entire civilization and caused chaos with just one bomb.

Terdoh: I’d like to point out that the Joker didn’t even HAVE A PLAN! He just did things as he went along. He only planned his immediate action. If the Joker was a pirate, even Jack Sparrow would be afraid. And you do realize that Bane was a house boy right? Acting on Talia’s orders. Joker reported to no one. Apologies to those who haven’t seen the movie for that spoiler.

Cumical: I think that gives him even more points. Bane, the house boy, the minion, caused that much chaos and almost convinced us that he was the main villain. Executed the plan so beautifully that Batman was so incapacitated he had to watch it on the TV in a well somewhere in Africa, LOL! And do you know how hard it is to work for a woman and satisfy her? (No pun intended). Let’s not underestimate the power of the ‘house-boy’ please.

Terdoh: I would pick Joker’s chaotic brilliance over Bane’s organised mayhem any day. Joker’s was more entertaining, more fascinating. Joker kept me enthralled throughout. Bane wanted to destroy Gotham, Joker wanted to watch the world burn. The fact that Joker had no plan and caused that much chaos is a plus on his side. Respect the greatest villain ever.

Cumical: *sigh* let’s move on.

***

Who executed their plan better?

***

Cumical: I guess we have a winner Ladies and Gentlemen.

Terdoh: Yeah yeah. Bane?

Cumical: Yes nigga, Bane.

Terdoh: That’s an unfair question. Joker had no plan to begin with, okay? You can’t execute a plan you didn’t think of.

Cumical: The Bank heist was well executed. It was such an excellent display of game theory. It was so well executed; I used it in my Final Year project. The kidnap of both Harvey and Rachel while he was in prison to prove a point was amazing. The way he literally walked out of prison, the killing of the people who stood in his way, the messages he sent to Batman, how can you say he didn’t execute a plan?

Terdoh: Uhm…bro.

Cumical: What?

Terdoh: Wanna switch sides? Cos you’re kind of helping me out here.

Cumical: Nope. I’m making a point. Joker had plans and executed them well. Bane just executed his plans much better. Had a master plan from the very beginning, and executed it to the very end. And do you know Bane’s plan was really just to break Batman’s spirit? You could see the fulfilment in his eyes when Batman eventually defeated him and he said “I broke you”.

Terdoh: You’re getting emotional, let’s move on.

***

Who caused Batman more pain (both physical and emotional)?

***

Cumical: Definitely Bane.

Terdoh: Definitely The Joker.

Cumical: Physical and emotional pain? Definitely Bane. “You think darkness is your ally? I was born in it. Moulded by it…I didn’t see the light until I was a man” does anyone remember that scene? Where Batman had his mask looking like mashed potatoes? I don’t remember Joker ever lifting Bruce 8 feet in the air…

Terdoh: I agree that Joker was no physical match for Bats, but remember that Joker killed Rachel. Literally took away Batman’s reason for living.  Sent him into early retirement for 8 years. If anyting, Bane gave Bruce a reason to live. There’s no greater emotional pain than a loved one being taken from you.

Cumical: There’s having the bones in your spine exposed.

Terdoh: I know you see my point.  You just don’t want to agree. Let’s not forget that Joker took Gotham’s white knight and turned him to the Dark Knight. The real Dark Knight. Harvey Dent going rogue was another bruise on Batman’s conscience cos he felt responsible for it.

Cumical: BANE BROKE BATMAN’S BACK! AND HIS SPIRIT! AND HIS FACE GADDEMMIT!

Terdoh: *sigh* next!?

***

Who was overall a better villain?

***

Cumical: Hmmm…

Terdoh: Admit defeat please.

Cumical: Never!

Terdoh: The. Joker. Is. The. Best. Villain. Of. All. Time.

Cumical: *sigh*

Terdoh: There are not many villains that will charge an entire mob half their life savings only to light matches and burn it down. Joker defined the word “villain”. Joker is the villain’s villain. The Joker makes all the other villains look like shit. Joker took a dump on the other villains. Look in Webster dictionary for the word “villain”, you’ll see a blooded smile with the “why so curious?” on the side.

Cumical: Terdoh, you know Bane was a lot smarter than the Joker. He’s on intelligence level: Einstein Hates Me. You do realise that this ‘house boy’ brought mayhem. Imagine what he would have done if he wasn’t following orders. He was a lot stronger too, no doubt. Man, I’d hate to see what Bane Unleashed would look like. Batman won’t stand a chance.

Terdoh: Story. Joker is overall a better villain. He wasn’t doing it for money, or fame, or world domination or all that bullshit cartoon villains are always doing it for. He just wanted to watch the world burn. That’s a true villain. Bane cannot top that.

***

Who was a better fit to counter Batman?

***

Cumical: Bane ma nigga. Bane.

Terdoh: Surely you kid.

Cumical: I don’t know what you think, but hand-to-hand combat is a huge part of Batman’s super hero career. Need I say more?

Terdoh: Jesus Cumical, Batman is known as one of the smartest super heroes, I’m sure you know that. Joker shredded his IQ when he was trying to figure out who he was and what he wanted. Let’s not go there please. Joker was by far a better fit for the character of Batman. And he remains his arch nemesis till date.

Cumical: I hear you. But Bane threatened the city of Gotham. Bruce’s first true love, forget Rachel.

Terdoh: All of Batman’s villains (except Scarecrow) have threatened the city of Gotham. Okay? Bane did nothing special. Batman has never faced an enemy like The Joker and probably never will.

 

***

Who was more closely true to their comic book counterparts?

***

Cumical: At this point, you have to concede defeat bruh.

Terdoh: Why? Joker was a lot like his comic counterpart.

Cumical: The only similarity was in the colours. The comic joker never had scars, and his hair was always sleek. LOL! But they added to his character, I admit. On a serious note though, Bane couldn’t have been any better. Huge, terrifying, absolutely brilliant, weighing like 900 pounds, and working for Ra’s Al Ghul.

Terdoh: Do you know that The Joker’s rating was a perfect 10? Critics could not have asked for anything better than the villain they were given okay? End of. Joker wins. Always…

Cumical: We’re just gonna throw this to the people. Who was a better villain? Joker or Bane? Please drop your comments.

M.Y: Sigh. Zubby, you see how your friend’s multiple personality disorder is getting worse daily?

Zubby: Mehn, M.Y I no know o. Just sit down dey debate Bane and Joker for the last One hour. Anyways readers, he has made his points though. Who do you think is a better Villain?

RIP HEATH LEDGER

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