M.Y: Hey my people it’s been a while and I offer my sincere apologies for the dissathon department which has been on a really long break. Even our fans from Yankee and jand have been calling me to ask how far
Eric: Yimu. Be there deceiving yourself.
M.Y: Hater. Anyways. So for those who don’t know what a dissathon is, when we are not so fortunate and we end up seeing a not so good movie, this is how we console ourselves.
Eric: We come on here and just go all wolverine on the movie.
M.Y: Errr speaking of Wolverine…….never mind. That’s another episode. So. House of Copper. How…..
Eric: House of Gold you mean?
M.Y: I know what I saw and I saw house of copper. Please don’t confuse me. End Of Discussion
Eric: Smh. Lemme just leave you. So House Of Copper. How are we gonna go about this?
M.Y: Errr. Let’s play the good cop bad cop card on this guys. So you be the bad cop. I will be the good cop
Eric: Oh I can finally loose my last shot at my crush Yvonne Nelson abi? Sigh. Okay. No p *puts on leather jacket and shades*
M.Y: *throws away face* Alright down to business. House of Gold is directed by Pascal Amanfo and stars Majid Michel, Eddie Watson, Yvonne Nelson, Luckie Lawson, Umar Krupp, and Nigerian musicians Omawumi Megbele, Mercy Chinwo and Ice Prince Zamani.
Eric: So a dying owner of a house of gold Dab Ansah Williams embarks on a mission to call all his numerous children back home to spend one week in the house of gold. The re-union proves a little more than everyone bargained for as each child returns to the house of gold with an agenda, setting the stage for the most hilarious and bizarre seven days of their lives.
M.Y: Wassap with the house of gold you keep repeating?
Eric: I am promoting the movie na. Lol. Abi I no do well? First Nollywood review and all.
M.Y: The movie could have had a better intro. That could be as a result of the cinema where I saw it, but it just started like a low budget music video. It could have had more “swag” if I am permitted to use that word.
Eric: The character development was good, everybody’s role was well outlined and defined, But then the story told was not just working for me.
M.Y: Like every other major flop in history, House of Gold began with great potential but somehow ended up going last-flight-to-abuja on us all and just crashes shortly after takeoff.
Eric: Are we gonna over look scenes Like the Lipton logo showing in the supposedly Congolese tea?
M.Y: Nope we are not.
Eric: Or are we gonna overlook the fact that an android phone which was in call and on baba house of gold’s ear had its back light on and menu button was visible? (techies will understand this)
M.Y: Nope we are not.
Eric: So what are we overlooking?
M.Y: Let’s overlook the dragged story.
Eric: LOL…Okay then. Moving on.
M.Y: Well. Decent directing. Pascal Amanfo is no newbie. But as always with most nollywood movies, I almost went deaf. Ahn ahn! The echo and noise.
Eric: Bro. I think that was your cinema not the directing. I heard the movie was disrupted about three times, mouse drags showing all over the screen and they restarted several times and then the noise from the event outside the hall was disturbing. Is that true?
M.Y: Sigh. It is true o my brother. And that was my first time to the prestigious cinema in the heart of V.I. So like you said ‘maybe’ that’s the cinema’s fault. Though a friend also complained of the same thing happening while watching Turning point at the same cinema but in Abuja.
Eric: Yvonne Nelson?
M.Y: She was okay. Nothing special. First movie of her’s I am seeing and I wasn’t impressed.
Eric: Ice Prince?
M.Y: Lmao. The guy should stick to his soup and star abeg. No road for nollywood for am
M.Y: Well. She did try. I was surprised I didn’t think she could act. But she still needs some training though.
M.Y: That guy is now fat sha. Best act in the movie I must say. But never the less…they were really poor performances
Eric: Err is that all?
M.Y: Yeah yeah. Please move on.
Eric: House maids and driver?
M.Y: Well. What do you expect from house maids and a driver? Not much. The house maid (main one) was just forming tongue twister
Eric: Be feeling like a tornado. Hiss.
M.Y: Nollywood addicts would have had a great time watching this movie. Which admittedly was indeed funny.
Eric: But then. It is what it is. A badly written funny movie. Nollywood heads would love it. If you are a big fan of a GOOD movie and you were attracted to this movie by the awesome title and lovely poster, then move along. Nothing here for you.