[Movie Review] Django Unchained

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M.Y: Good evening folks. Y’all should please grant us the permission to fool around a bit. 2012 provided some very memorable lines so wordplay is the game and you simply provide us with the name. Alright guys let’s start off.

TerdohArgo f**k yourselves?

Zubby: Remember, always have a contingency plan?

M.Y: Jarvis: power at 400% …how about that

Terdoh: If I say day, you say…wasted.

Agent?…Provocateur.

Woman? …Provocatrix.

M?… B***h.

Gun?…

Zubby: Terdoh! that one too long abeg. Stop. Thank you.

M.Y: LOL. And we have the last one, “Gentlemen, you had my curiosity, but now you have my attention”

Terdoh: Django, yes Django Unchained. What’s funny is that the movie isn’t even out in cinemas, yet half the populace has seen it.

M.Y: Chai! Bandwidths flying all over the place. I cant even download my  5mb favorite Tonto Dikeh song I mistakenly deleted. But for the few who haven’t seen it let’s tell you what it’s all about.

Terdoh: Written and directed by Quentin Tarantino. Starring Jamie Fox as Django Freeman. Christopher Waltz as Dr. King Schultz, Leonardo DiCaprio as Calvin Candie, Kerry Washington as Broomhilda and Samuel Jackson as Stephen.

Zubby: Django Unchained is simply the story of a free slave Django who with the help of a bounty hunter sets on a mission to free his slave wife from a crazy, charming and charismatic plantation owner Monsieur Candie.

M.Y: This  movie is simply Inglorious Basterds but this time, the Nazis are replaced with Plantation Owners, Brad Pitt and his gang with Dr. King Schultz and Django Freeman and the target audience to be pleased are black folks watching the white boys get wasted Quentinisiously

Zubby: Please explain what that word means

M.Y: Oh, it simply means Children are not supposed to see this movie. It is strictly R18

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The Script

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M.Y: A few years back, I watched Inglorious Basterds and I fell in love with Quentin Tarantino’s post-modern what if it happened like this style of eliminating the Nazis. Once more, Tarantino returns with a sequel and taking another controversial subject in human history which was the American Slavery. With the same theme as Basterds, you should definitely be expecting the same twists that are not expected.

Terdoh: With awesomely witty dialogues and his splendid writing, Django Unchained has one of the most uniquely created works of fiction I saw from last year. Inspired by Sergio Corbucci’s 1966 spaghetti western film Django, which was about a man hunting his wife’s killer.

Zubby: Quentinisiously? Spaghetti western? Where are all this words coming from?

M.Y: LOL. Don’t blame him He is simply telling you what the movie is bro.

Terdoh: Are we really going to not talk about the soundtrack of this movie? The 100 Black Coffins track? Amazing… Unexpected too… Who would think of hearing Rick Ross’ voice in a Tarantino movie?

M.Y: Expect the final installment to the historical trilogy series sometime in the future called “Killer Crow”. This will be about betrayed black soldiers in World War II. Damn! I am loving this guy so much.

Zubby and Terdoh: Urh???

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The Directing

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M.Y:  Django was set in 1858. Very few directors can actually do what he does and get away with it. Considering his typical lengthy dialogues, excessive violence, exaggerated gunshot effects. Tarantino happened to mix fact with fiction in his depicting of the historical events in this movie quite perfectly.

Zubby: The movie was shot 70s style! The accents, the clothes, even the way the camera zoomed in and out…

Terdoh: Even their teeth…

Zubby: Down to the way they spat. And the Mandingo fights…

Terdoh:  BTW, Mandingo fighting was based on undocumented rumors that slave owners staged fights.

M.Y: Wow, Terdoh has been reading some history now. Amazing how a good movie can change your life. I loved the zooming effect. Sick!

Zubby: The reference to the K.K.K only served as mockery to its members. They were not formed until about a decade later. But then-again the joke about em sure was funny.

Terdoh: That was arguably the best scene in the movie. Where Jonah Hill made a guest appearance.

M.Y: I literarily laughed my ass off during that scene. Amazing how the mask maker escaped and everyone else died? Such is life folks. Repent from your sins. All in all, I will say that the little pieces cut together and the details put into this movie made it the master piece it is. But personally I think he should step down the tone of his violence.

Terdoh: That’s what makes him Tarantino. Nolan makes you wonder, Spielberg blows things up, and Tarantino shows us gunshot wounds. The universe keeps turning…

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The Acting

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Zubby: Whenever you have Leonardo DiCaprio starring in a movie, you sure can expect top notch acting. I am extremely sad the guy is yet to win an oscar. I mean, who else deserves it more.

M.Y: Like seriously and neither has Samuel L. Jackson won one. But that’s not to say other actors in the film didn’t deserve oscar nominations with their acting.

Terdoh: Jamie didn’t get a nomination. In fact, only Christopher Waltz did. But hey, those guys acted their hearts out. Samuel Jackson pulled off his character so well, I started to hate Samuel Jackson himself, Waltz stole the show, and DiCaprio was just…amazing.

django-unchained-stephen

M.Y: Those guys had so much fun acting this movie. This is the first movie I saw white men using the n word and I didn’t feel offended one bit. And Jamie? That guy is bad judgement for bad people mehn. Like Sirkastiq and Terdoh said, we really need Dr King Schultz and Django in this country.

Zubby: Jamie Foxx, I must confess, really impressed me. His acting was top notch, A+, excellent to say the least. I was super impressed.

M.Y: Jamie, Jamie, Jamie first a comedian, then a sitcom star, then a musician and now an actor to be reckoned with. Who knows what he’ll go into next. Maybe Jamie Foxx for president, watch out Obama.

Terdoh: If na joke, abeg stop am.

M.Y: In some other news, he is acting The American president in a movie with Channing Tatum called “White House Down” scheduled to be released later this year. So the n….sorry is on his way to the white house already.

Channing-Tatum-and-Jamie-Foxx-in-White-House-Down--585x358

Zubby: Christopher Waltz justified his Oscar nomination for Best Supporting role. And Samuel L Jackson, despite his good acting here, reminds me of Uncle Rukus from The Boondocks.

christoph-waltz-as-dr-king-schultz-in-django

Terdoh: Black man that hates black men.

django-samuel-l-jackson-stephen-uncle-ruckus

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Our Verdict

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Terdoh: This movie is, in my opinion, the best movie that came out from last year. I know, it’s a tough choice. 2012 was good to us. Gave us Looper, TDKR, Prometheus, Argo, Skyfall…

M.Y: Life of Pi, The Hobbit!! Damn!

Zubby: And then this.

Terdoh: But still, Django Unchained takes the cut. This movie wowed me. So this movie for me gets a Popcorn, Soda and Hotdog. Watched it 3 times and I’m still amazed.

M.Y: Sealed and Certified. What? Got something to say?